Reasons Not to Date a Photographer

Found this through my interwebz friend Momo of Tabetic Zombie, these are the ones that are me. The original list can be found here, at Not A Starving Artist.

  • They rather hold their bulky camera, than hold hands with you.
  • They like to sit in obscure coffee shop and voyeuristically watch people for great lengths of time.
  • If you’re taking a walk outside and you come across some “interesting light” they will make you sit/stand/pose in public so that they can take a photo.
  • You’ll wait longer for them to finish analyzing art in a museum than you’ll wait at the dmv.
  • Same goes with old used bookstores.
  • Or they are actually using you to not look so creepy as they people watch everything going on around you.
  • You can’t take a photo with them without taking at least five more.
  • They spend all their time on the computer (and not for porn.) 
  • They still use film cameras. 
  • They’ll be fussy over the position of a common household object, like a coffee cup.
  • They like watching old films that you’ve never heard or will ever understand.
  • They like looking at weird things in general.
  • Instead of having penis-envy, they have camera-gear-envy.
  • Everything is watermarked.
  • They want to color correct a lot of scenes from Twilight and Jersey Shore.
  • They like trespassing into old abandoned buildings filled with health hazards.
  • They always want to show a new photo they took, but don’t really care if you like it or not.
  • Bright, sunny days make them sad, but cloudy, overcast days are apparently great!
  • They’ll take you into places that have “culture” as well a high chance of getting mugged.
  • You can’t go anywhere new without them stopping to take a photo of everything and anything.
  • Bringing their camera means, bringing 50lbs of equipment.
  • They are natural hoarders, collecting and keeping piles of old newspapers, packaging, magazines, and other things that “inspire” them.
  • They are weird and geeky.
  • They have hard drives of photos, but probably have printed 10 images. 
  • If you’re ever in auto mode, they laugh at you.
  • They orgasm every time they learn a new lighting technique.

Does a New Year mean a New You?



Have you ever done a New Years Resolution? I think I may have just once.

This year I came across Lyn of Witch Blog's I Can Change ONE Thing. I thought it would be a nice thing to try. Especially with all the changes I've been doing this year. Plus I feel I just need a little help focusing this year with the whole PPD thing.

Not so much that I want to change who I am, just that I think I'm losing focus of who I am. I'm hoping that making a nice list of things I want to get done will help. I also want to start doing more things. Things that I used to do, like read, write, take photos.

I feel like I've been stuck as Mom whose name is Amanda, not Amanda who is a mom, if that makes any sense.


Inspired by Pagan Blog Prompts




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There is Changes a Comin'

So I am making an attempt into blog design again. I want to revamp things. I want to try and make it something completely mine. This may take a while. Correction this will take a while. As Ariel is now mobile and loves to get into things.


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I dub thee Christmas Magic Jars

Now not on purpose I totally forgot about Santa gifts. I mean how mean of me. Karlee's mommy reminded us to make sure there was a gift from Santa for her. Which slightly irks me but that is another story.

But in keeping with my Yule domestic feeling I decided to make them something. I looked and looked for some ideas on the interwebz but alas couldn't find anything that I could a) afford and b) make in time. Then I remembered the cute little tins I bought when i got the Santa gift bags. I couldn't pass them up, so I grabbed one each of the different designs not knowing what I would use them for.

Well Yule came around and I went out again to Michael's and got silver glitter, white glitter (called fairy dust funnily enough), snowflake confetti, silver ribbon, and cute little jingle bell ornaments. And this is what I got!

I dub thee Christmas Magic!
 I put in the confetti and add the glitter till I thought they looked about right. Then I used my gift tags from last year, little Santa hats and tied them and the ornaments on with the ribbon. If you shake them up it looks like a little snowstorm with never melting snowflakes! Best part is the tins have openers so I just didn't add them to the ribbon so little hands won't be opening them.

I think Karlee's came out best though, probably cause she has a snowflake design on her tin. What do you think?





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Yummy Yule Makings

So for Yule I decided to be all domestic. I not only cleaned the whole house (which my grandma later trashed), but I decided to make some gifts. We as you know are broke this year. So unfortunately I did not have money to buy gifts for everyone like I usually do. Honestly my mom gave me money to get the kids BIG gifts from us.

This year I actually prefer the gifts I made though. I think it adds something more to it, plus I could make them for everyone. Thanks to Kiki we also had cool photo gift cards to hand out. So we made homemade hot cocoa mix to give out to everyone with the cards.

AJ even helped me make it!
We modified a recipe I found on Modern Parents Messy Kids. I doubled it but also took out the espresso. The original recipe is here. What I used is below.

  • 2 cups of unsweetened cocoa powder
  • 2 cups of granulated sugar
  • 2 cups of powdered milk
  • 1 cup of chopped chocolate chips (since I didn't have mini ones)
This made about 18 two person servings. I printed gift tags again through Modern Parents Messy Kids but linked to here. I used Santa gift bags that I got at Michael's. Here's the finished product.




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Inspirational Quotes 12/14




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Inspirational Quotes 11/27




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Images from tumblr

It's not all "welfare queens"




angry, young and poor by ~stacheLhaut


I will never understand the urge some people feel to talk out their ass about things they have no clue about. I mean I know we must all have opinions on things but really when someone tries to explain an error in your ways to you, do you have to be such a jerk about it?


Normally I don't really care what you want to believe but this time it's a little personal. Government assistance. I know I may of complained about it, but it does help, it does serve a purpose, and surprisingly enough there aren't tons of "welfare queens" on welfare.

News flash: when you hear about "welfare queens" it's when they got caught, and kicked off welfare. You don't hear about the ones following the rules, doing what needs to be done, and getting off welfare, because it's not sensational! That is it. You hear about "welfare queens" because they are sensational.

Not just that but they lie through their teeth to get so much money, the regular people on welfare work their butts off to get a job and get off welfare. Which is actually the opposite of what welfare sets you up for. They set up to fail, and have to go on welfare again. They give you barely enough to get by and then the moment you get any money they take away everything.

Also they actually prefer you to give up your job. Yes. I said it. They told my hubby that he would have to give up the safer car and quit his job to go on welfare while I was pregnant and on bed rest. Just so he could move into the housing I was at. I said fuck that, we moved back with my grandparents.

Right now we are off assistance even though we actually need it. Why? Cause I said, and was told by my therapist that I'm not ready for work. It's not even worth it. Not just that but you know the big problem ... I'm ashamed of needing help. 

I almost didn't get help for my postpartum depression, because I thought I was a bad mom for needing help. I didn't want to go on assistance in the first place cause everyone associates welfare with "using" the system. When you go on about "welfare queens" all you are doing is making the regular people that are on the outs and need help feel ashamed of getting the help.


Point blank, end of story. Going on about the few "welfare queens' makes the regular people feel ashamed.




Going Primal

Have I mentioned that I've been seriously thinking about going primal? As in the Paleo diet? In all honesty it just seems like one of those things that might actually work for me. I mean that is naturally the type of foods I would prefer to eat. I just need to get some willpower.

One of my inspiration for this is Paleo Parents. I just kind of love their site. Plus the confession post she did is awesome.

Did I mention they are going to have a book? Eat Like a Dinosaur check it out!






Do Doctors Care More about the Patients or the Technology?


prozac by ~Glasserpi

Notice how more and more doctor offices are going digital? I mean it is pretty cool that they can just send in prescriptions but what happens when they put everything in computers? Normally it's not such a bad thing.


My regular doctor has those nifty little touchscreen flip over laptops and I never have problems there. But recently my kids' pediatrician and my behavioral health office switched over to all digital records. This would be better if, like my regular doctor, they had the good reliable equipment and backups on papers. But of course, they don't they have a bunch of slow PCs with what looks to be updated software.

At first, I said that's alright, so we take a little longer for appointments. Now I'm not so sure I like it.

Why you ask? They put everything on the computer, they have no more paper records. They can't even call in a prescription without the computer cause they don't have the numbers! Then they can't even do anything in a timely manner.

How did I find this out you ask? Well, they booked me for two appointments back to back. One with the LCSW (I think that's her title) "D" and the other with the psychiatric, they had me reschedule the appointment with the psychiatric. I said that's fine but I will need a refill for my Prozac before that next appointment. Not a problem, they say, I'll send him a note right now to send it in, she tells me. LIES! Of course, I don't find that out till I'm on my last pill and call for the refill for the pharmacy to tell me sorry we don't have anything for you.

Then it's a game of phone tag with the receptionist that is driving me crazy. I call and leave a message. No reply, I call again, I get told she will put a(nother) not into the doctor to send in a prescription, but it won't be done till the next day since he's not in. Call pharmacy next day and they again have nothing. Call receptionist, she tells me computers are down so they couldn't do anything. I said I've had NO Prozac yesterday or today and I'm not feeling right, what can we do to fix this? She asks for my info and the pharmacy number and says she will have the doctor call it in. Wait, have coffee with cousin Kiki (the day before Day of Mass Action for Occupy Wall Street, she was a protester), head to the pharmacy.

And guess what?! No prescription for me. They call receptionist. She says he is in the middle of an appointment and she is still trying to get everything together for him to call. (Say what?!) She will try to have him call before they close. I am seriously almost in tears, but honestly, it's not the pharmacist's fault.

Call the next day hoping they had called in the night before. Nope. No refill. Meltdowns ensue. Crying. Screaming. Wanting to bite heads off. Nausea. Which later that night led to bathroom stakeouts and being sent to my bed with a bucket.

Call the doctor's office on Friday afternoon and ask what's going on. I mean by this point I'm losing it. I've been sick. Snapping at everyone. Crying that I just want to feel normal again. She says she has to look it up and figure out what's going on and will call me back. Oh yeah, she calls me back. About 20 minutes before they close, to tell me they have a written prescription for me to pick up. By the time hubby gets there to pick it up the door is locked.

So I'm upset, irritated, emotional, crying, snapping at everyone, crying, screaming that I want to feel normal again. I feel so bad for my kids. But I guess the good point is I know the therapy is working.

But I mean, in all honesty, I would have gone to the office and picked up a written prescription the first night. But the lure of technology was too strong. They didn't even offer it as an option. It had to be electronically sent, or called in, they can't write it down.

My whole problem is they put not just my health and sanity on the line but they put my kids' health on the line. I am the primary caregiver. I am the one that is home with them all day and all night, most nights just me and the kids. When I was first put on Prozac I was told, repeatedly, not to just stop taking it. I had to be weaned off of it. That I could have severe side effects. I could become suicidal.

And what did they do? Cut me cold turkey. Why? Because of their dependency on technology.

Do you have Passion?




I just finished the third Fallen installment, Passion by Lauren Kate. And I can't wait for Rapture.

In the last book we were left off with Luce jumping into an Announcer in search of the reason she loves Daniel. All through out Passion we see Luce traveling through her past lives with the mysterious Bill helping her figure things out. She became Princess Lys, an Aztec sacrifice, and an Egyptian slave, to name a few. She figures out the reason for the curse, to see if their love is true.

Of course she finds what she was looking for. Plus a few surprises along the way. Including Bill's real identity, the real reason for their curse, the riff between Heaven and Hell, and why Cam actually is a good guy.

Like the rest of the series it is an excellent read. I can't wait till my kids get a little older so I can reread it without all the interruptions.






How I discovered I was a Pagan


You ever get that feeling that something is off? That it just doesn't sit right with you? I used to get that feeling all the time growing up. I went to church. I went to Sunday school. I actually read the Bible front to back about three times. I have a few Sunday school teachers in my family. One of my cousins actually went to seminar school. I can quote and talk about scripture better than most Christians. 

But yet I just always had this nagging feeling that it just wasn't for me. 

I believed in faeries, I had a fey guardian that I used to talk to all the time. I knew things before I was told. I was always being told not to eavesdrop, even though I tried to explain I hadn't, that I just knew it. I was also very precocious for my age. I was doing college level algebra after finishing my homework. I was reading regular fiction books in 3rd grade. I was just different. 

It wasn't until I was in junior high and out shopping by myself at the mall that I realized just how different I was. 

Hanging out in the bookstore (who remembers WaldenBooks?) I started hearing drums. No lie. Tribal drums. Drumming that spoke to my soul. Thing is no one else seemed to hear it. I played hot and cold trying to find out where it was coming from. A book. Not just any book but my first magic book. 


Once I picked up the book the drumming stopped. Looked at the price and brought it. I mean come on the book drummed to me. It called out to me. I had to have it.

I went home that night and started reading it. Oh my Gods! It clicked into place. This is what I was. This is why I didn't feel right. I couldn't believe it. Things I had dreamt about were stories in this book. Things that I knew just by knowing were in this book. I was like wow. 

Since then I've been Pagan. I was 14 years old.







Inspired by Pagan Blog Prompts

The Double Standard in Parenting

The reasons I stay home
Do you ever just have a moment when you realize it kind of sucks to be a mom nowadays? Because it's kind of a damned if you do, damned if you don't type of situation. I mean everyone has a theory on what you should be doing, whether you should be working or be a stay at home mom. But either way it's a catch 22, cause they will still say you are doing it wrong. 

AJ being Woody
But dads on the other hand ... well they have it completely different. Dads get a round of applause and a clap on the back for just being there, even if it's only for visitations. Don't get me wrong, they are treated mostly as baby-sitters, as my hubby is by the StepPrincess' mom. For dads though it's work or stay home, either way you're doing a great job.

Ariel eating Olivia, the other white meat
But I mean think about it, really think about it.

A typical dad day is going to work, coming home, changing a diaper, passing out to sleep, complaining about not getting enough sleep, and repeat.

Meanwhile a stay at home mom's day is get up at the crack of dawn after waking up to feed the baby, change diapers, chase down the older kid, while feeding the baby, make breakfast, down some coffee, wrestle kids into clothes, make sure they do more than watch tv all day, make lunch, manage to get kid to eat lunch, nap times, dinner, bath time, and then getting the kids to sleep, and repeat. At some point throwing in a shower and dressing yourself, or passing out before bothering.

Or as a working mom (since I did do both) you wake up at the crack of dawn after waking up to feed the baby, make breakfast, down coffee, rush to the baby-sitters, rush to work, work your butt off while missing your baby like crazy, getting through rush hour to get to the baby-sitters, getting home, making dinner, trying to spend some quality time together, bath time, then bed time, and repeat. 

Either way you look at it moms do more, usually. And either way they do it, they get told they are doing it wrong. Adding in that they are most likely thinking they are doing it wrong to begin with. If your staying home, most people consider you to be lazy. If you go to work, people think you don't spend any time with your kid, and usually that you have no clue on how to parent them.

I'm tired. Anyone have some coffee for me?






Inspirational Quotes 11/10