Disappointed....

So you may have noticed some changes in how I've been online and in real life if you know me other than on the interwebz. You may know that my fiance dumped me, after moving to Texas, where me and the kids were suppose to go too. You may know how much this hurts me, how deeply it shattered my heart, how lost it made me feel since it changed some big plans in mine and my kids' lives.

What you probably don't know (unless you know me in person) is that we had both decided daycare fees were too much and wouldn't make it worth me getting a job outside of the house. That we had sold my car to save money after having our daughter, meaning since he moved to Texas I have to borrow a car or bum a ride to get anywhere. Including doctor appointments for the kids, and my therapy appointments. That I put my kids needs and wants before my needs. That if I have to choose between toys for my kids or shampoo for me I get them the toy. True I do have a Starbucks habit and I do smoke, but I don't go out, I always have at least one of the kids with me, I don't party, I buy myself stuff (majority of what I wind up getting for myself is freebies I find online). I do this cause I rather my kids be happy, and cause I thought we were saving up for me and the kids to move to Texas to be with my fiance.

Then I found out that he had already gotten his own apartment, and hadn't told me. I found out through Facebook. It took me 4 days of pleading through text and voicemails for him to finally tell me he doesn't love me anymore. This is not the first time we had broken up, but it will be the last.

I was going to move across the country, I loved him, I would have followed him anywhere cause when I looked in my heart I saw him. But now I can't trust him anymore.

After breaking up with me he lied to me for weeks, lied and flat out ignored me when I asked about our tax refund. Since we weren't married but I am a stay at home mom (I didn't make enough last year to file myself) he claimed not only our daughter but me as dependents. Out of what we got back I asked for $1000, for the kids. At that time I asked we were still engaged and I thought he was saving money for us to move down with him. Even after we broke up I still said I would take only $1000 so he could pay off some bills, why cause I'm nice and I still loved love him and wanted him to get out of debt.

He spent the entire tax refund. On what I have no idea. Nor do I really care. The fact remains that it's gone.

I want to make very clear that, that money was for the kids. For Ariel and AJ.

That money was go to for:
  • new car seats (their are old and grimy)
  • a new stroller (ours is old and grimy and a little broken)
  • summer clothes for the kids
and most importantly
  • to take Ariel on a trip to PA because she was going to be a flower girl in my friend's wedding.
If, if, there was money left over I was going to get a 50mm lens since it is a better lens for portraits which is what I do for a living.

I had to regrettably tell my friend to ask someone else to be her flower girl, I felt bad cause she was looking forward to having Ariel be in her wedding. I'm still hoping I can go down for the wedding.

He "says" that he is saving up to replace what he owed me, but wouldn't answer when I asked how much was saved. Our cell bill wasn't paid and the phones got shut off. Since it's seeming like I can't really trust him I went and got my own cell phone line. He did send his "child support" but since part of me giving him a break and not going through the courts was that he was suppose to pay the cell bill on time.

Basically I don't mind if he or anyone else wants to screw me over, I'm a grown up I can deal with it, but I will not deal with someone screwing over my kids. I will not deal with someone, especially one of their fathers essentially stealing money from them.

Now for the help part. I need money, yes I'm working on increasing my income. But I do need to get them the car seats, and now I need to involve a lawyer in order to get my share of the tax refund I was suppose to get for the kids. I also have to file for child support with the courts since I will be honest I was surprised (and relieved) when he sent Ariel's child support and that shouldn't happen. So no more miss nice girl. This girl is going to take him to court to get what is owed for her child.

SO I would appreciate tremendously anything if you could donate. A dollar, a penny, it doesn't matter it all adds up. And if you truly can't donate (which I completely understand) please share this post.

Also I won't be offended or upset in the slightest if you simply don't want to donate. I know its a big thing to ask, and I know it's not the normal thing to do, so no worries. This is just my swallowing my pride for my kids part of getting the funds together.

I will also be adding any money I make to my ultimate goal.

I will also accept any legal advice through my contact form.

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